So I'll give this movie an A+ insofar as the special effects are concerned. Very solid, gooey, slimey stuff. Beside that, though, this is an utterly dull movie with very little going for it.

Really, the title appropriately pulls you in, but the movie's not necessarily schlocky or anything. It has that very serious 70's tone (save for a little comedic relief thrown in by Edwin Max's and Dorothy Love's characters) that's dry as all hell, and while I sometimes appreciate a somber atmosphere, I was more bored than anything. In fact, it reminded me slightly of the awful Another Son of Sam, though this was nowhere near as bad.

It was still bad, though. Honestly, Edwin Max and Dorothy Love are the only two characters here with, well, character. Burr DeBenning, Myron Healey, Ann Sweeny, Michael Alldredge, Lisle Wilson - all boring as hell. I don't know how much any of them can be blamed, but boy, talk about stilted performances. Cheryl Smith gave us a little nudity, though, so kudos to her.

Like I said, the special effects here are certainly worth seeing. Even the conclusion is more somber than you'd expect, so there's a little here that almost make it worth the trouble, but that may be a bit generous. The special effects were great, but when the story's so damn dull, it doesn't really make a difference.

The Incredible Melting Man certainly had a melting man in it (and when he fully melts toward the end, again, it's impressively depressing), but it's not near as fun a story as you might hope. There were some unintentionally funny scenes (such as that slow-motion run near the beginning), but more often than not, it's just an excruciatingly slow movie, and save the effects, really isn’t worth it.